Santa Jaws!

"Santa Jaws," colored pencil on paper
by Karen Kay Remus (c) 2017

Unlike Santa Claus, who comes down your chimney, Santa Jaws swims up your drainpipe and attacks you in the bathtub.  It is literally a "blood bath."  He doesn't care if you've been naughty or nice. He cares about you like the Starkist Tuna announcer cares about Charlie the tuna:  He only cares that you taste good.