Bitter Ass

"Bitter Ass," Pen on Paper by Karen K. Remus Copyright 2016

Every fan of the original Star Trek series is familiar with Spock's memorable singing performance of "Bitter Dregs."  In the episode, "Plato's Step Children," these Ancient Greek-style aliens with telekinetic powers made him sing this song against his will, for their own twisted amusement.

Well, if they had that much power, they could have had a lot more fun with the lyrics, evoking silly imagery and killer puns.  I mean, if you can penetrate Spock's stoicism to the point where later on, he's doing a "Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum" dance with Kirk, you ought to be able to make him crack up the house.  

As it was, Uhura and Chappel just stared tearfully at him as he sang Bitter Dregs.  Perhaps they were just crying due to the lyrics.  If those aliens had been really been thinking, they could have created a cosmic sensation with "Bitter Ass," as depicted above.  

"Bitter Ass," the extended version, would have crossed over to radio airplay, making the top 40, and Leonard Nimoy could have hung up his ears for folk-rock super stardom.  He already had the right pants (in his usual Star fleet uniform).  Droool....

To refresh your memory:

Leonard Nimoy was the BOMB! I'll love him forever.  May he rest in peace!